Put me on my death bed right now and I would spend most of my time snivelling and trying to get sympathy. In between, if you were silly enough to ask, I would probably recount my life in journeys. Student debt to solvency, single to happily married, starting points, turning points, aspirations. You know, the big stuff. I might not mention which particular diet fads worked or didn't work. I may not remember that mistake I made at work which was not significant but for which I spent nearly an entire week mentally crippling myself. I would definitely not care whether on Tuesday 24 August 2003, someone had remembered to put the bins out.

And yet on a daily basis approximately 90% of my energy is ploughed into just those issues and the bigger picture is....well, a bit over pixelated.

This is fine, I reason. And perfectly rational. What is important however is not to let stuff I won't remember prevent me from finding the time to create the memories I will cherish.

And so....operation no regrets. Beginning with a travelling adventure. Eleven months, eleven counties, two backpacks, myself, my husband and the odd mosquito along for the ride.

Friday, 13 February 2015

Charmed

I know it sounds smug but i do often think we lead a kind of blessed life. Sometimes it just seems that everything goes right for us.  

We get up, sun streaming through the window of our beautiful and simple homestay room and we go to the cooking class we have planned. The class is amazing, and we cook no fewer than six different dishes in addition to walking round the farm and harvesting our own ingredients. This of course also means we eat a six course lunch! On top of this the other people in the class are not just lovely but really interesting to talk to. It's a big class so I am thinking of about five or six people in particular, who just happen to also end up sitting with us. Even the selection of people to travel back to Ubud in the various cars works out for us and we have a lovely conversation with a couple on their honeymoon in which we eshew growing up and all that comes with it and resolve to remain as childish and irresponsible as we currently are for as long as possible.

The rain stops just in time for the Barong dance at the art museum not to be cancelled.

We go to take a rather wistful second look at a beautiful carved mask we saw the first time we went to Ubud. The price at that time was quoted to us as being close to a thousand rupiah, not much in pounds, but well outside our budget, given that we are travelling for so long. This time when we traipse in and stand on front of it, we like it just as much (we had hoped to have gone off it) and one of the staff comes over and quotes us a price. It's a fraction of the original price quoted. We are not sure how this happened and we haven't tried to barter but one shop assistant on one day seems to think it costs a different amount to another shop assistant on another day.  And we're not going to argue. We walk away clutching a souvenir we thought we couldn't afford.

And finally, when the dance finishes, a nice man from the art museum offers to drive us home. For a price of course but its less costly and much friendlier than the usual taxis and we get a further insight as he chats to us, into village life.

And we do seem to have quite a lot of days like that. Is it attitude or privilege or just blind luck? Some people have said it is attitude - that it's the filter through which we chose to see things. We got wet in the rain which stopped in time for the dance, the drive back was elongated because of the traffic and we weren't in time (shock horror) to be in the front row for the dance due to a miscommunication about where, given the weather, it was going to be held. I suppose we could have focused on those things and had a very different day, despite it containing the same events.

But that does seem a little convenient. Attitude helps. But for some people, everything does seem to always go wrong. Do we blame them for not having a positive enough outlook, and condemn them as authors of their own misfortune?  I hope not. That approach seems a bit medieval. 

And it is, in some ways, definitely down to privilege. It would be a nasty kind of snobbery to refuse to admit that, through no action of our own, we were born to parents who weren't exactly loaded, but who encouraged us and valued work and education. And through another stroke of luck we happened to have enough intelligence to do well. And then to have the option to work hard and save hard and earn enough to do this. Yes we worked hard for it but there were certain conditions heaped in our favour right from the start. And we did nothing to earn that. It was just our fortune.

Even with that I know plenty of people who don't seem to spend so much time up as opposed to down (we do get down too. We are not complete angels ) and who were born with at least as much good fortune as we were. If not more. 

Some of it might be as straightforward as being easily pleased. We really like simple things. We get excited when we see a gekko, even though there are loads of them. We like to stroke a cat, to listen to the radio, to see green fields, to cook food, to meet friends. The gekko doesn't have to be on the verandah of an expensive villa, the cat doesn't have to be pedigree and devoid of cat habits (such as mouse and bird catching and coughing up the odd fur ball), the radio doesn't have to be satellite TV(!) or even a specific programme, we don't have to own the fields and it's OK if they're muddy, the food doesn't have to foie gras with champagne and the friends are allowed to be human and don't have to be accompanied by an expensive meal in a restaurant or a cocktail party.

All of which is relatively easy to achieve.

Who knows. Maybe we really are somehow charmed.

And we didn't deserve it.

But, if you're listening God or Lady Luck, Providence or Chance - whoever we might each believe is responsible - we'd just like to say we're really grateful.

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